Testimony of Emma Turner

I have been a member of the church since I was 8 years old.  I have been a convert of the church since I was 18.  I remember the day vividly.  I was attending Ricks College.  My roommates and I had gone to church and were walking home.  One of them commented that she hoped we had locked the apartment.  Another roommate said something like it didn’t matter, we had our testimonies with us and that was the only thing of worth that mattered.  It struck me then that I did have a testimony!  I realized that I was now going to church because I wanted to.  Not because my parents wanted me to.  It was a big revelation to me!

Since that day, I have tried to be better and do better.  I am not a great scriptorian, but I have tried to live my life with honor.  I was lucky enough to find a good man who loved the Lord.  That made it easy to keep the commitments I made in the temple.

I have felt a strong confirmation of things like that only a handful of times in my life.  One was when I realized that I would marry Reed if he asked me.  It was a very similar experience to knowing the church was true.  It was just a kind of “waking up”.  Suddenly, I could not doubt.  I could only accept and move forward.

Most of the time, my testimony has grown through small steps.  Usually it is little whisperings and insights here and there.  Trials have strengthened me .  When we weren’t able to have children when we wanted to, I had to have faith and trust in the Lord.  I had to believe that my patriarchal blessing would be fulfilled and accept that it might not even happen in this life time.  I had to walk in the dark for a little while.  I have learned that walking in the dark makes the light on the other side so much brighter!  I am grateful for the experience now because I think it made me a better mother when I finally got the opportunity.

When it came to making big decisions like moving Illinois and Canada, I had to walk in the dark again and trust that the decisions we made were right.  It is not easy for me to “let go” and just “look up”.  I know that the choices we made were right for our family at the time.

Most recently, I had the strong confirmation that we should go on a mission.  This was a shock to me!  I had always known that we would go on a mission and I would do it, but I didn’t think I would be excited about it!  I tend to do things more out of a sense of duty and of wanting to be dependable.  But for the past several years, I have been trying to do things simply because I love Christ.  That puts a whole new meaning to things.  About a year before the decision to come on a mission, I started praying that a change would come into our lives.  We were happy and comfortable, but something was missing.  I knew it would be hard for Reed to leave his “stuff”.  That worried me a lot and I wondered how I could convince him to leave it all behind.  I need not have worried.  It was in God’s hands and he took care of it.

We were led to come on our mission; just as we were led to each other, and led to Illinois, and led to Canada.  Sometimes I balk at the changes, but in hindsight, I can see how God’s hand was always in our decision making.  Even when we made not great decisions, He made it right for us.

My testimony has only gotten stronger since being on a mission.  As we work closely with the young missionaries, I see how they are blessed both physically and spiritually.  I have gone contacting with them in the dark in areas that I would not want to go at noon!  I know the Lord watches out for them.  I see their deep knowledge of the gospel and love of the Lord.  It is absolutely amazing to me that we have over 84,000 young men and women who love the Lord enough to leave their families.  It is incredible!

I have seen the great importance of having Senior Couples and Sisters serve missions.  There is so much work we can do to help the work go forward.  There is so much we do to allow the young ones to teach.  They cannot teach and pay all the bills and pick up all the mail and deal with landlords and sickness and buying supplies and the many other things the Seniors can do.  I am glad that we can make their life a little easier and help their parents sleep a little better knowing that someone is watching out for their child.

I don’t know the scriptures well.  I don’t know the doctrine well, I don’t do everything as well as I would like.  I feel inadequate in so many ways.  But I do know that God loves ME!  Warts and all.  And I love HIM!  And I am doing my best to serve Him and build his Kingdom here on earth and show my love to Him.

Sister Emma Turner
November 11, 2014